As an entrepreneur, I have put my heart and soul into my business from day one. In the beginning (which was 10 years ago now), sleep was optional. I’d sit at my desk all hours of the day and night perfecting my website, my offers, and my work for clients. I skipped meals, workouts, and showers. I built up quickly and filled my little business to capacity, so I carefully curated a team to support me. I evolved and expanded and learned more and more, only to teach what I knew to people who wanted to learn from me. I had what nearly every online business owner searches for in the beginning: a thriving six figure business. (Italics because it’s so cliche.)
And now? Now I’m exhausted. I’m burned out. Some days I don’t even want to open my email because I know that work is waiting for me in there. I want my team to do everything so I can sneak in some time for myself, but I’m not really doing anything for myself at all. I’m pouting.
Yes, pouting because I have too many clients, too many responsibilities, too many people to be in charge of, too many people relying on me. And all this pouting makes me feel selfish because I have exactly what I asked for 10 years ago when I started my business.
And since hiding from my own amazing creation is counter-productive, and let’s face it, dumb, I’ve decided to redefine how I view “success”. Success doesn’t have to mean having the most clients, having the biggest team, or making the most money. It doesn’t have anything to do with launching, list size, or the next online course.
Time to Let Go
I’ve cut my client list in half. I let go of clients who were difficult to work with and I have fewer team members supporting me. I’m shifting my goals from trying to get the most shit done in the shortest amount of time to connecting to my remaining clients on a deeper level. Getting to know them and their businesses in a more meaningful way. I’m also learning to recharge my body and my mind without feeling guilty.
The picture above is of my 13-year-old daughter and my best friend’s almost 4-year-old daughter. We spent an amazing Sunday afternoon on our boat pulling the kids around on the innertube, laughing, playing, and being goofballs. I only used my phone to take pictures and videos of them, and I didn’t stress out about all the work that was sitting in my inbox. I enjoyed each and every moment (except when my husband allowed our 9-year-old to drive at 30 MPH). I felt refreshed and renewed and took that feeling to work on Monday.
This will probably be a way of working that I’ll need help with, but I’ll do my best to continue it. My body and soul need the deeper connections with people and the rest that comes with letting go of what no longer serves me.
My 9-year-old is cruising us around the lake at 30 MPH! Don’t worry, my hubs is right behind him.
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